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Lou Reed vs. Ingrid Superstar

The following conversation between Lou Reed and Ingrid Superstar was taped by Nat Finkelstein at the Factory:

Ingrid Superstar: Lou Reed looks like a pretty little girl, with short hair. How tall are you Lou? About 5'10", or 5'11?

Lou Reed: 5' 11 3/4"

Ingrid Superstar: Oh, he's 5' 11 3/4" - being particlular about 1/4 of a fraction of an inch. Are you Lou?

Nat Finkelstein: Have you been trying to make Lou?

Ingrid Superstar: Have I been trying to make Lou?! No.

Nat Finkelstein: Oh, come on Ingrid.

Ingrid Superstar: I don't make nobody, they make me. And he's got brown curly hair, he usually wears sunglasses. And he's slightly built and he's got a pug nose. That's about all I can say about Lou. Do you want me to describe Sterling Morrison? Sterling is very tall, and lanky, and slender and lean and he's got shaggy medium brown hair that looks like it's never been combed or washed. And he's got blue eyes, usually concealed by sunglasses, and he usually wears striped shirts and brown or white Levis and he's got a couple of faded blemishes on his face. Sterling's the friendliest. Sterling's always been a doll, he's a pussycat. I mean he'll talk for hours and make jokes. He can tell the funniest jokes. He'll have you in stitches, rolling, and yet he seems to be so quiet, sort of a Bill Wyman type. But Sterling is the biggest extrovert, the most open. He's a regular guy. He'll sit here with a beer and tell jokes and tell stories. John Cale. Good grief. I couldn't begin to describe him, he's just funny looking. He's got straight black hair, parted sometimes in the middle and sometimes on the side. When it's parted in the middle it gives him that bohemian Buffy St. Marie look, and he's growing a goatee with a matching moustache, which is really way out. All he needs is a pair of antennae - he can, you know, be an equivalent to a Martian. Yes?"

Lou Reed: He looks very Mephistophelian.

Ingrid Superstar: He looks very Mephistophelian. What does that mean?

Lou Reed: The devil.

Ingrid Superstar: Oh yes, he looks like a devil. The devil's disciple. He usually wears baggy pants and boots that are way too big for him, so he trips all over the place, and he wears a baggy shirt or a flower-print shirt, with puffed sleeves, Gerard Malanga-style. Well, that's what he was wearing in Chicago. And he's got black eyes, and he's very very relaxed, boring at times, but then aren't we all? And it's not an excuse. And he usually wears sunglasses. He's Welsh. One of the interesting characteristics about him is his little Welsh accent. And then last but not least there's Maureen Tucker. The only girl in the band.

Lou Reed: She isn't a girl.

Ingrid Superstar: Oh, she is too, Louis. Listen, I stayed with her the whole time in that hotel in Chicago and she is a girl, who was always the biggest mystery because nobody could ever ever figure out Mo. She's a beer drinker. She sits in the pub and knocks them back! She's absolutely straight - you keep on looking for the Buster Brown shoes! If something embarrassed her she just turns red! Maureen's very natural. She doesn't wear any make-up. She told me, I asked her. I even felt her hair. She's got freckles, and she's a cute little Irish girls, very religious, goes to church every Sunday.

Lou Reed: You know what her favourite expression is?

Ingrid Superstar: Yeehaw.

Lou Reed: No.

Ingrid Superstar: Ho hum.

Lou Reed: No.

Ingrid Superstar: What?

Lou Reed: You piece of shit.

Ingrid Superstar: You piece of shit. I thought that was Faison's expression.

Lou Reed: No, it's Mo's.

Ingrid Superstar: Well, then Mo must have plagiarized it from Faison. She's got average build. She never wears a skirt, except when she works or goes to church. She's a very sweet...

Lou Reed: She doesn't wear a bra.

Ingrid Superstar: She wears a bra.

Lou Reed: She doesn't have to.

Ingrid Superstar: I think every girl has to, or every girl should. So, anyway she's a very quiet, calm, sweet person. And very easy to get along with.

Lou Reed: She's no virgin.

Ingrid Superstar: Oh, yes she is.

Lou Reed: Oh, get out of here. She wouldn't be in the band if she were.

Ingrid Superstar: I don't believe anything Louis says. He's crazy. Like the rest of us. But, what would this world be if it weren't for us crazy people? Oh, and last but not least, I must describe the road manager, Faison. Oh, God. Oh, well you could call him like Captain Kidd, because he looks like a pirate, he's got real, real curly almost kinky brown hair, level with the bottom of his ears, and he's got a full beard with a moustache, and like the front of his beard curls up, and he wears one earring, pierced in his ear. Probably sterling silver earring, similar to the one that Edie used to wear, only much shorter. He can be a bitchy person, but so can everybody. He's a real pool shark, along with the rest of The Velvets. He's got a mean temper, and he says he's a Scot but I don't believe him, because he looks more Jewish. All he needs is a pole you know, and he'll look like Moses, oh, but that's Allen Ginsberg's award.

Now, last but not least, we come to the beautiful flawless, chanteuse, Nico. She's got blonde hair, sort of Jane Asher style, down to her shoulders. She's got blue eyes, and she's about 5'9", 5'10". A very good photographic model, and actress, and she's got great potential. She could be like 5 or 50, like being an actress in a movie, and she could make it in Hollywood any day. Her voice is very bland and calm and low and smooth. Some people mistake it for a boy's voice. And she sings sort of like in one tone mostly. She doesn't have too much modulation, which is groovy, it's like a new sound. She's just a very, very beautiful girl - a cool Dietrich for a cool generation.

Lou Reed: How old is she?

Ingrid Superstar: She's 23. And she's got a very, very cute little German accent. (UT59-62)


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